The second arrow is your fault

Heard in Santos (2022)

There is a Buddhist parable called "The Second Arrow of Suffering". The main idea is that we cannot avoid the first arrow, but the second is under our control, for it is the ripple effects from the first one.

In other words, we must:

1. Notice the first hit, become aware of the feelings around it.
2. Try to accept those feelings and avoid damaging behavior (basically, "take a deep breath").

Other entries that are somewhat related to this:

• This is water
• Worrying about things outside your control is wasted energy
• The Stoic Trichotomy of Control